There will come a day, months after that day
When the inevitable will happen
And your position in my life will become both past and future
I’ll see a girl who looks like you, and she’ll smile like you did at my jokes
And her eyes will tell me all the things you used to whisper to me.
We’ll probably date for awhile,
At first to make you hurt then long enough for me to start seeing you in her reflection
To blend our memories together with hers
How parasitic we really are
Time will pass and I’ll only be as open with her as I was with you at that point
Strangers who pretend to be lovers
Intoxicating each other with false promises
Then
I’ll call you
I’ll miss you
I’ll tell you let’s go back, that it’s all been a bad dream
And you’ll awake to my message and hate me, because your whole day is already tainted with the thoughts of me
You’ll respond only to make me feel better and I will until I see her again, and then I’ll feel more alone than ever before
I’ll try to see her as her, to love her like a passion,
However, I’ll always be reminded
her lips, your kiss
her hands, your touch
Does that make me a bad person?
That I want to mold another into your image, would God get jealous of my creation?
Because you were and are and all she can ever do is be
Your absence is her invitation
She only exists now, in my loneliness
As a ray from the light you shared with me
But deep down she will know this is pointless, because she knows she isn’t you.
There will come a day, months after that day
Where my toughest decision becomes my greatest mistake
He doesn’t look like your type
Maybe that changed after me
But it matters not because he’s here
And I was there
I saw him
He’s yours and you don’t even have to tell me
The way he glows from the aura you provide
I know he’s loved by you
Because I was once loved by you
In his eyes I see the truth
That he feels invincible and innocent
He’s seven years old again with you
I bet his love taste like heaven
his hands explore your frame
And the way he holds you in will make you forget I ever happened
Will you forget I happened?
A fading mist on the edge of a long dream
How long will my pictures and books and promises stay in your apartment
Or will he appear before I have even had a chance to turn into a memory?
He will smirk when he meets me, because he knows he has done the impossible
How he healed and mended the scars I thought I was carefully cutting
I should’ve ripped your heart up, so only I could put it back together again
Instead I left it intact, sitting on ice ready for another to handle.
Does that make me a bad person?
Because I’d be so drunk on selfishness that I’d restrict you only to me.
He will be there and you will want nobody else, especially not me.
I’ll love her because she’s just like you, and you’ll love him because he’s nothing like me.
The Nuclear Cottage 