I see my past when I see her

There I am

A seedling

With eyes bigger than my heart

And there you are

A girl

The first girl

Who I remember

Maybe because of words exchanged,

How tasteless they were

But my mouth had yet to form truths

Only spewing what the brain spilled

From the darkness.


I find myself older

But not by much

Hormones and self-hatred flow in my veins

Because my skin doesn’t fit

At least that’s what they tell me

But you say nothing

And that’s all I want to hear

The pulse of a prayer

Gifted by lips in the form of laughter

Able to bring enough of me back

To believe in the black that I am cloaked in.


Time and space are wedges

Tools used to split us apart

Because I forgot you

For years

And you forgot me

For who knows how long

Until by chance

Flesh failed and biochemical notes enter book bags

Faulty anatomy brought you down

But lifted something up

As we waited in the sterility

Hoping to see tomorrow,



The day finally came

When I knew freedom

My tongue has twisted enough times to know

That truth lies in the hands

Your touch reminds me

Of moonbeams and fireflies

Ice cream and sun-showers

How infectious you are

Susceptible to your every whim and wish

Taking every penny from my pocket

And tossing it into the fountain of youth


If you stick around this time

I’ll be able to say what I couldn’t

The first time we must

Underneath the fluorescent lights.


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